Saturday, March 24, 2012


Today I attended a bridal shower for my cousin. Twenty-one years ago she was the flower girl in my wedding. Thirty years ago I was the flower girl in her mom's wedding. Her mom is my mom's youngest sister. It was a beautiful shower. Her sister and bridesmaids threw the shower for her. They thought of everything. She was surrounded by people who loved her. It was so evident by the things the girls did for her.
My sister and I sat with our aunt throughout the shower and our thoughts during the whole event kept drifting to our aunt who was not there with us. We could not help but think of her. She was missed. We wished she could have been there with us to celebrate, but we understood why she was not there. I mean honestly, if it was me, I don't know if I could have come myself.
I guess it is time I write about it. I have not been able to write about it, talk about it or barely speak about it. It is still so very painful, so raw, so very hard to believe. My other aunt, the one who was missing from the shower, she lives around the corner from me. She is only 7 years older than I am. We were pregnant together. I was having my first child, she was having her second, my sister was having her first as well. We were all pregnant together. Eventually our children wound up attending school together. In June 2010 the three cousins graduated from High School together. It was a wonderful moment, celebrated greatly as it was the day my son came home from the hospital after his horrific accident.
My sister and I both had boys. My son was the oldest, my nephew was born next and last, was dear, sweet, beautiful Susie. Susie was smart, kind, different and everyone's friend. She was the President of their class all four years of HS and she was simply, just amazing.
Tragically, this past November 22nd, the night before Thanksgiving, without warning, with no illness, Susie went into cardiac arrest while at home with her mom and died. She was 19 years old. It was instant. Her mom, a cardiac nurse tried to do cpr, but there was nothing she could do. EMT's came, but there was nothing they could do. Two hours after the call went out our dear, sweet Susie was gone. Her loss is immense, the pain so raw. Her mom and dad, her brother andrew and his fiance angela have lost their girl. There is not greater loss than this. Their hearts, our hearts, they are broken.
Susie had a way about her. She made everyone who came in contact with her feel good. She was always smiling. She was always happy. She would make you laugh! She LOVED everyone. She saw the good in everyone. She reached out to everyone. Susie was unique.
So today on this very special day, she was missed, my aunt was missed! There will always be a piece missing when our family gets together. When Susie left this earth, she took a piece of our hearts with her. I do know though, she is smiling down on us. I LOVE YOU SUSIE Q...
Her brother made this website about her, her friends have written tributes about is beautiful! It is called LIVE LIKE SUSIE...I am passing it on b/c it is what helps her family get through the really tough days! May you all LIVE LIKE SUSIE!


elsie said...

Oh Katy, I am so sorry for your family's loss. She sounds like an incredible girl. "Live like Susie" is so powerful to follow for a lifetime. Life is fragile, you have experienced it too often.

Anita Ferreri said...

You have described the greatest loss a family can have - the loss of a child. It is a great sadness and as you already know, it changes the dynamics of family life. Life is indeed fragile...each day a often we need to be hit over the head to remember.